How To Be A Good Parent With Good Parenting Skills?

Do you have good parenting skills and know how to be a good parent? Generally a baby is a welcome addition to the family provided you are well prepared for the joyous occasion by acquiring good parenting skills.

How to handle a defiant child to make it behave?

You must plan beforehand for the arrival of the baby by educating yourself on rearing children to provide adequately for the physical and emotional well being of the child. For itís healthy growth, the child needs your love and attention, a safe and healthy environment to grow, healthy food and proper education to cope with life.

Educating yourself on good child rearing tips should start well before the arrival of the child. Rearing a child can be a rewarding experience provided you know what to do to satisfy the needs of the child at different stages of itís growth. Parenting skills are nothing but your ability to know the needs of the child at various stages of growth even before the need arises and also the capacity to fulfill them adequately for the childís healthy development, physical and emotional. A child faces many challenges during the growth period and it needs your love and undivided attention to overcome them.

Babies should be observed by qualified physician regularly for proper immunization, signs of diseases and also for growth problems. Proper ear, eye and dental care checks should also be done at regular intervals.

Children are vulnerable to accidents and so it is important to child proof your house. Every house has potential hazards that should be evaluated for the safety of the child and proper remedial measures should be taken such as construction of window and staircase guards and proper storage of poisons away from the reach of children. Care should also be taken to ensure protection against open flames, electrical connections and machinery. Water filled buckets or tubs should be kept away from the childís reach to avoid accidental drowning during itís exploration of surroundings. Children should be educated on accidents that might happen out side home due to reckless play activities, swimming, and the dangers of traffic.

All children from pre-school onwards should be educated on how to avoid sexual abuse without frightening or overwhelming the child with information overload. They should be taught that no one has the right to touch the private parts and if any such event occurs it should be brought to the notice of the parents immediately.

For a child, the process of growing up can be confusing and at times frustrating as it has to satisfy itís needs and at the same time has to satisfy parents and others with the right behavior acceptable to them resulting in avoidable conflicts. The way the child deals with the conflicts may not please the parents or others initially but eventually with proper guidance, the child learns to behave in the acceptable manner. But it takes time and patience for the child to learn the right behavior that satisfies all.

Babies cry a lot since it is the only means of expressing their needs, fears and frustrations. However uncontrollable prolonged crying is not healthy. It should not be mistaken as a behavior problem but should be taken as a warning of physical pain. As a parent you must look out for uncharacteristic , persistent and unusual behavior which may be indicative of underlying problem that should be corrected. Activities such as bed wetting, crying , thumb sucking, temper tantrums, learning and speech disabilities can be annoying but it should be remembered that they are appropriate at the particular age of growth but vanish later. If such activities persist, they may be due to other physical or emotional problems.

How to handle a defiant child and make it behave?

Biting is the first behavior problem that usually starts when the child is teething but it can also be a reaction to frustration when the child tries to possess a toy from other children. Biting can also occur when the child craves attention. Parents should discourage such behavior by using praise as a tool. And by telling the child that it is not the right behavior as it hurts others. It is important to prevent the bite before it occurs and praising the child can be an effective tool.

Children need to be taught discipline at an early age as it helps them learn standards of behavior , sense of responsibility and self control which are essential for the child to become a productive member of society. Inconsistent or excessive discipline are counterproductive resulting in depression, rebellion and other personality disorders. Parents should set an example for consistent standards of behavior since children tend to imitate their parents. Children should be praised for the right behavior to encourage them to acquire it. Parents should make sure that the rules and commands given to children must be clear and developmentally appropriate. It is advisable not to repeat the command more than once since repeated commands are ineffective and may induce anger in the child.

The toilet training should start at the age of two since the child will be ready for the task by now. It also involves conflict as the child is denied the freedom to relieve itself freely but forced to hold back the instinct to relieve itself unlike earlier times. Some children learn quickly but others take time. Bowel control precedes bladder control and girls learn faster than boys. By the age of two, children are able to control their urination during day time but it takes time to have bladder control during night time.

All healthy babies are active and like to explore their surroundings. However hyperactivity can also be due a condition known as attention deficit disorder(ADD).This usually occurs before the age of seven and can be treated with medication. The symptoms of this disorder are unusual sleeping habits, over reaction to stimuli and inappropriate behavior.

A child of 2 years resorts to breath-holding spells out of frustration and anger to manipulate parents who are overly solicitous. This may result in temper tantrums accompanied by stiffening, jerking of the body and sometimes epileptic seizure.

Bed wetting is another problem that affects more boys than girls. Family history and stress are the main culprits but there can be other reasons too. Most children by the age 5 are dry during daytime but can not control it during night time. Bed wetting occurs during sleep and most children overcome this fully by the age of twelve when the bladder muscles are fully developed and strong enough to hold back. Teaching the children to void before sleep and avoiding fluid intake before sleeping will also help.

Children throw temper tantrums in response to frustration between the ages of 2 and four as they can not cope with frustration. They express themselves violently by acting out aggressively through screaming, kicking and crying when reacting to frustration. Punishment is not going to stop the tantrums and it is better to leave the child alone to sort things out on itís own. A tantrum can be rewarding to the child if the parents concede to the demand of the child in order to stop this unacceptable behavior. Once the child realizes that throwing a tantrum can be a rewarding experience, it will continue this unacceptable behavior vigorously and the severity of the tantrums will increase. If the child is in a safe area it is better to ignore the tantrums without bargaining with inducements and the child will realize that tantrums as a means of attracting attention will not work and gradually will calm down. But extremely violent ones should not be tolerated . As the child grows, it learns to cope with frustration in a mature manner and slowly the temper displays subside.

Lying is common among children who lie to conceal their wrong doings. The child should be told of itís high worth and the unconditional love and affection of itís parents.Lying stops as the child grows and develops moral standards but if it persists, it may lead to anti social behavior.

Thumb sucking, self-rocking and masturbation are considered normal among children at an early age especially when they are upset. The habit of thumb sucking is normally given up around the age of five or six .As the child grows, these habits vanish gradually.

Children who are slow learners, those who do not start speaking early and those who stutter and grope for words cause worry to their parents. These inadequacies disappear as the child grows but if they persist, it is advisable to go in for specialized help. Sometimes hearing impairment may be the cause and once this problem is addressed, things become normal.

Some children have sleep disorders such as sleep walking which affects about 15% of children for which special safety measures are to be taken to avoid accidents during sleep walk. Usually for most children this condition disappears after the age of 15. Some children are affected by nightmares who wake up with a scream and appear to be affected by extreme fright. For most children Sleep disorders get resolved automatically as they grow.

The parents should use tact and understanding to change the unacceptable behavior of the child. The following tips may help.

To stop the unacceptable behavior draw up a contract with the child by being specific about the problem behavior of the child such as not putting away the play things after play. The contract should be in writing in clear terms about the rules and the consequence of breaking it. If the child is threatened with dire consequences such as confiscation of toys if they are not put away, it works most of the time. This type of mutual agreements in writing is also useful in dealing with adolescent children.

Create a check list outlining the responsibilities of the child and the special privileges for the child if the child completes certain tasks. Special privileges can be awarded against a predetermined number of checks and revocation of privileges will occur for non compliance with the rules.

Studies show that making the child undergo exercise training in camps for a few days or weeks is found to be beneficial. For severe child behavior problems, individualized family therapy can be helpful.The other option is to consider taking the help of a child psychiatrist who may study the case thoroughly for proper treatment.

Other therapies such as dietary interventions have been proven to be ineffective and sometimes even counterproductive causing inadequate nutrition for the child which may aggravate the situation further.

Related links:

coping with anger in children

How to cope with difficult children

Thanks for visiting the site and I hope the information provided here is useful.Wish you successful parenting.

back to family&home page

back to home page

we protect your privacy

terms and conditions

Note:All external links are sponsored.